13 Phrases An Emotionally Healthy Guy Will Never Say
As much as guys talk about women being crazy, what I’ve seen over the years is that men tend to be the crazier of the two main genders out there.
From what I’ve noticed, many of them also tend to be way poorer at hiding their case of crazies than women are. Speaking as someone who’s done it before, you should never slam your clam on crazy.
Avoiding crazy is crucial unless you want to end up catching a case of the crazies yourself. Thankfully, it’s pretty easy to see which men aren’t exactly the healthiest options out there.
And you can even do it by paying attention to what they say and figuring out the signs he’s not emotionally healthy.
An emotionally healthy man will never say the following phrases:
1. “You’re not like most girls, you’re actually cool.”
Any time that you hear a guy talking smack about the entire female gender, you can guarantee that he’s got a bitter, poisonous, and toxic mindset. Simply put, healthy guys don’t generalize like that and definitely don’t have that much bitterness in them.
2. “I don’t actually believe women feel love.”
This is one of those phrases that I’ve said about men but can acknowledge that it’s not something that is healthy to say. I’ve felt the same way about men for a long time.
I’m still not totally 100 percent on them being capable of love, simply because of the abuse and abandonment I’ve faced. However, I also realize I’m not in the best emotional state due to dating-related PTSD.
PTSD will make a partner paranoid, needy, and, at times, act like they have Borderline Personality Disorder — and that can make them very hard to date, if not downright terrible partners. Many abusers, too, will say this to try to entice women into trying to “fix them” and prove that they can love.
No matter which way you look at it, this isn’t something anyone who is emotionally well will say, and as such, it might be for the best to skip them.
3. “C’mon, just give me a fair chance. I’m a nice guy…”
If you’ve dated this century, you’ve heard man-children whine about how dating isn’t fair. People who believe in being “given a chance” are people who don’t understand how dating works, and tend to see women as objects or dating Sims rather than actual human beings.
That being said, nice people don’t have to announce they are nice; people will quickly notice they are, instead.
4. “I’m an Alpha Male.”
I want to point out that this is a really outdated way of seeing wolf society, and that in real wolf packs, there is no “Alpha male.” That aside, men who say this tend to have confidence issues with a streak of controlling and misogynistic behavior.
They use the word “alpha” as a way to rationalize treating others poorly and as a crutch for confidence. This misogynistic outlook isn’t something a healthy man will have.
5. “Look, I drove all this way and paid for dinner. You owe me.”
This shows what psychologists call “aggrieved entitlement.” Aggrieved entitlement occurs when people think they’re entitled to things that they actually have no right to, and in the case of dating, often signals that they will become sexually abusive, emotionally abusive, and physically abusive.
The scariest part is that guys who think this way do not see anything wrong with this, either, because they literally think they deserve it. Yeah, you don’t want to date this kind of person.
6. “Women are so sensitive, am I right?”
This is one of the major signs he’s not emotionally healthy, because emotionally healthy people would realize that they need to take other peoples’ feelings into account. If he can’t do that, then he can’t be a healthy partner.
7. “Feminism is a disease.”
I don’t know what’s up with so many men these days. A guy who can’t stand the idea of equal rights for women isn’t someone who has a healthy outlook on dating.
Simply put, there’s no point in trying to establish a partnership with someone who doesn’t see you worthy of having rights or autonomy.
8. “Women only want men for their money or their looks.”
Once again, this shows bitterness, misogyny, and unhealthy outlooks towards the opposite sex. Do not try to fix men who are like this; the only person you can change is yourself.
9. “I have rage/drug/sexuality/abuse issues.”
Good on him for admitting it, but if this is the case, he’s not emotionally healthy. At all. Like, run, girl.
Just because he admits there’s something wrong with him doesn’t mean that he isn’t unhealthy.
10. “Wait, you’ve had sex partners before me? How am I supposed to deal with that?”
From personal experience, any guy who prefers a ridiculously low partner count has issues dealing with their sexuality. A healthy person would have enough confidence to realize that numbers don’t matter and that their sexual insecurity is their burden to deal with, not yours.
11. “I don’t play games. No games.”
I’ve never seen anyone who said this actually be worth time. If you feel like dating games are the only way to get ahead in love, you’re probably not all that well, emotionally speaking.
12. “My ex [insert details here about how they broke his heart]. Such a b****, my ex. Did I mention my ex did that?”
Look, I’ve been there. I know how it feels to be so hurt by people that you just need to vent to a date. I understand this. However, I’d be lying if I said that this is something emotionally healthy people do.
It’s okay not to be over an ex if you’re a guy or a girl. What’s not okay is to be the person dating them hoping that you can fill that space.
Emotionally well people don’t do this, and if you’re looking for a long-term deal, you need to realize that this never bodes well for the partner being vented to.
13. “Dump your boyfriend for me.”
This phrase is literally selfishness, personified. Do I really have to explain why this is not something that a healthy person would say to you? Hopefully not.