The 3 Emotions That Hijack the Brain

Emotions guide our actions. They help us decide whether to start, maintain, shift, or stop what we are doing—based on our current bodily state, the surrounding context, and the meaning we give to both. In this way, emotions act like an internal compass, pointing us toward what matters or warning us when something is off.

Throughout the day, we experience a wide range of emotions. Most pass through us without much disruption. But three specific emotions have the power to completely hijack our brain—to override reflection, bypass reasoning, and drive us toward impulsive, often regrettable, actions.

When these emotions take hold, we lose our emotional cool. We act on autopilot. The thinking part of the brain goes offline, and the emotional part takes the wheel. The longer these emotions go unchecked, the more they intensify—and the more they derail us from what we care about in the moment.

It is important to highlight that these are not “bad” emotions. No emotion is bad in and of itself. Emotions are messengers, not enemies. They exist to give us information and to serve specific purposes. They help us survive, connect, and make meaning out of experience.

But these three hijacking emotions share a few traits:

• They narrow our focus to the object or event that triggered them.
• They generate intense internal pressure that demands release.
• And they pull us away from more important priorities, without us realising it.

You can probably guess the first two: fear and anger. They are loud, fast, and familiar. But there is a third one, less talked about—lust. Lust does not shout. It seduces. It whispers. And it, too, can hijack the mind.

Before we get to that, let’s take a closer look at how fear and anger take over the brain.

Fear: Your Brain in Survival Mode

When we encounter something even slightly scary, our brain registers it as a threat. And once a threat is detected—whether it is a snarling dog or a disapproving glance—our fight-or-flight response kicks in.

In that moment, all non-essential brain activity gets paused. Our focus locks onto the threat and how to respond to it. Should we avoid it? Confront it? Freeze and hope it goes away?

The threat doesn’t need to be dangerous in any real sense. It doesn’t even need to be real. We are wired to respond to imagined threats almost as intensely as actual ones. A common example? Freezing during a public speech. Your heart races, your mind goes blank, and every cell in your body wants to bolt. That’s fear hijacking your brain.

When fear takes over, attention narrows, body systems prepare for defence, long-term thinking shuts down, and we focus on survival, not strategy. This response has clear evolutionary value, but in modern life, it often backfires. Because of fear, we avoid necessary conversations, miss opportunities, or shut down when we most need to stay open.

Anger: The Fast and Furious Override

While fear kicks in when we perceive a threat, anger kicks in when we perceive an insult. Insult here goes beyond offensive remarks—it includes feeling wronged, misunderstood, disrespected, dismissed, or even directly attacked. When anger takes over, our attention locks onto the insult and the person responsible. Our instinct is to defend ourselves, often by going on the attack.

We raise our voices. Our posture changes to appear more intimidating. We use sharp language and zero in on the offender’s flaws, incompetence, and mistakes. What we don’t have access to is rational, reflective thought. The part of your brain that might say, “Maybe don’t post that comment,” is offline.

When anger hijacks, it feels like being caught in a wave, tossed around violently until it finally spits us out on shore, hopefully unharmed.

Interestingly, we respond similarly when we ourselves are the perceived offender. Anger turned inward can be just as punitive. No mercy. No special treatment. The same instincts to attack and punish get directed at ourselves.

Think back to the last angry argument you had with someone you care about. How did it go? Did you tell them how wonderful they are? How much you appreciate them? How proud they should be of themselves? Probably not. Chances are, you used more vinegar than honey.

Lust: The Stealth Hijacker

Lust is a universal human emotion, but one we rarely talk about openly. Even in therapy, it’s often sidestepped. It’s personal. Private. And yet, like fear and anger, lust can hijack the brain in powerful ways.

Lust isn’t just about sex. It’s about fixation, reward, and craving. When unchecked, it can lead to compulsive behaviours, distraction, and disconnection. At its extreme, it plays a role in sexual and pornography compulsions, obsessive infatuation, pathological jealousy, and intense self-criticism. More commonly, it can cause us to idealise someone we barely know, ignore glaring red flags, or make choices we later regret—because our brain is chasing a high.

Like fear and anger, lust arrests our attention, narrows our focus, and overrides our judgment. It doesn’t shout like anger or alarm like fear—it whispers. It floods. It seduces.

Neuroscientific studies show that during states of sexual arousal, brain activity increases in regions linked to motivation (like the nucleus accumbens) and decreases in areas involved in critical thinking and self-control (like the prefrontal cortex). Hormones like testosterone and estrogen surge. Dopamine floods the reward centres. Oxytocin promotes bonding and emotional intensity. The hypothalamus, which governs basic drives, is activated. Lust is, in essence, a full-brain event.

From a neuropsychological perspective, the picture gets even more fascinating:

• Attention narrows to cues of attractiveness or opportunity.
• Long-term goals are suspended in favour of short-term gratification.
• Inhibition drops, as impulse control and judgment are compromised.
• And, interestingly, the object of desire doesn’t have to be real.
  Fantasies and imagined scenarios are enough to keep lust alive, just as imagined threats fuel fear, and mental replay sustains anger.

So What Can We Do?

When any of these emotions hijack the brain, the goal is not to suppress or eliminate them. Emotions are not the enemy. But we can slow them down and re-engage the thinking brain.

This is where emotion regulation comes in. Emotion regulation is the ability to notice what we are feeling, understand how it affects our behaviour and goals, and choose actions that reduce harm and increase alignment with our goals.

One tool to support this is the LAPS strategy, a technique we developed through clinical research to help people regain emotional control:

Label

“I’m feeling [fear/anger/lust] right now.”
Naming the emotion activates brain regions associated with self-awareness and begins to engage the prefrontal cortex.

Allow

“It’s OK to feel this.”
Normalise the experience. Emotions are human, not dangerous.

Pause

“I won’t act on this yet.”
Create space between feeling and action. Let the wave settle.

Shift

“What else can I do right now?”
Redirect attention to something calming or cognitively engaging. Move your mind, not just your body.

Fear, anger, and lust each serve a purpose. They are part of being human. But left unchecked, they can lead us places we didn’t mean to go. Understanding how they work doesn’t make us emotionless—it makes us aware.

And awareness is how we get our minds back.