Arranged Marriage: 4 things to keep in mind before saying yes

Modern technology and values have certainly changed the traditional methods of arranging marriages. But it doesn’t mean arranged marriages don’t exist.

Love marriages are romantic and dreamy and you are filled with the excitement of marrying your soulmate.

But there are times when people often go for an arranged marriage instead of a love marriage.

This is because their parents have chosen a suitable match for them by keeping their requirements and needs in mind.


What is an Arranged Marriage?

In different societies, arranged marriages take different forms. While ancient arranged marriages usually involved elders in the community pairing up the youngsters, some modern-day matchmaking websites are playing a role in a new type of arranged marriage. Anytime a third party chooses the spouse for an individual, rather than the two individuals choosing for themselves, an arranged marriage is in the works.

Who chooses your spouse depends on the community of which you are a part. If your religious group traditionally practices arranged marriage, then your priest or other spiritual leaders might choose your mate. If you were from a royal family, your parents and the political advisors would find the most advantageous family for you to marry into.

Often people are hesitant to say yes to an arranged marriage as they think of it as being uncool and feel scared of spending their life with a stranger.

While indeed it is a scary thought, considering these things before saying yes, can make it less scary and much easier for you.


  • Be open

You two barely know each other. So to avoid any communication gaps, be open and direct in your approach. Don’t hesitate in asking awkward questions from them, like questions about their past. Know that it is normal for you to ask them such things to get to know them better.


  • Compatibility

The most important thing to consider before saying yes to an arranged marriage is to know whether you two are compatible with each other or not. From financial to mental compatibility, be sure about it before agreeing to the marriage.


  • Know the family

Make the effort to spend time with your to-be in-laws before saying yes to the marriage, to bond with them and to know whether you are comfortable around them or not, and to know about their family values.


  • Be frank

While talking to your to-be spouse, be frank and communicate what you want from the relationship. Clarify whatever you feel doubtful about and let them know your limitations if any. Tell them what you expect from the marriage and share your aims and aspirations with them that you wish to pursue after marriage.

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