Introducing Family to Your Partner Over the Holidays
Bringing home a new partner during the holiday season can be a true test of strength for the relationship.
Sparks of a new beginning are in the air, and the excitement of introducing someone new to the family can be very romantic.
For many individuals, meeting the family for the first time may also spark anxiety, fear, and awkwardness.
Even if you are:
Bringing home a romantic partner for the first time ever
A divorcee who is bringing home someone new
Bringing home someone who isn’t your usual type
The checklist below offers some suggestions that will avoid potentially awkward family interactions.
Always
Give your new partner some insight into what they are signing up for. Let them know if your family is a board-game family or a TV family, for example. What traditions take place? Is there a family feud or topics that are off-limits at the dinner table? Family traditions often aren’t the same from household to household.
Giving your new special someone a heads up on what to expect may help to avoid arguments or awkward moments.
Let the host know you plan to bring a guest. It isn’t a good idea to show up with someone unannounced. It is both respectful to the host and advantageous for you—everyone should be on the same page and informed. If you think an extra person at the table may put the host out in any way, offer to bring a dish or extra chair.
Nothing is better than your new partner being welcomed with open arms by your family, simple courtesies such as these go a long way in bringing about positive outcomes.
Consider sleeping arrangements if you are traveling from out of town. Is there room for two people where you usually stay? Should you get a hotel? Will the host feel comfortable with bed-sharing? Consider your options with your partner beforehand and make a choice that makes both of you comfortable.
Offer to help the host during the gathering. Lending a helping hand will look differently for each of us, but offering to bring a dish, help with cleaning up, or entertaining the kids are easy ways to help out.
Never
Don’t assume the host is willing to change around their traditional holiday menu to fit any of your partner’s dietary restrictions. If the host asks about restrictions feel free to share, but do not put any expectations on them to switch up their traditional meal. Offer to bring a dish that fits your partner’s restrictions.
Don’t insist that your partner participates in every one of your family’s traditions. It is okay to give your partner space during some activities. If they aren’t interested in participating in a game of Monopoly or Scrabble, don’t push it.
Don’t over-indulge in alcohol or other substances that may leave you or your partner behaving in ways that you would not otherwise. Getting too tipsy during your first family holiday together may leave a bad impression, potentially one you will be cleaning up for years to come.
Don’t overdo it on the PDA. While some family dynamics allow for more physical contact than others, it’s always safe to vocalize your affection. Talk each other up, rather than feel each other up.
The holidays can be a wonderful time to introduce a partner to friends and family whom you may not see often. Holidays present the opportunity to create new traditions that could last for years to come.
Remember that communication around expectations with your partner, along with clear communication with your hosts and family members will help ensure a memorable and fun holiday season for you and your loved one.