Learning How to Dream Again

Eleanor Roosevelt once wrote in her My Day column that you should “Do the thing you think you can’t.”

That thing, the one you want to do but think you can’t, let’s call it your dream.

Eleanor says go for it.

Dreams might be a dime a dozen, but having and following those dreams is priceless.

So, how do some people do it?

Got Luck? Talent?

Worried about not being lucky enough to have your dreams come true?

We make our own luck by being open to the world, reaching out, getting out of our comfort zone, and making connections that open doors. That’s luck.

As for talent, some people might be born with the ability to draw a good picture, but anyone can learn to draw. The same goes for just about anything else we think takes talent: playing music, dancing, singing, painting, arranging flowers, baking beautiful cakes, or running a successful business.

Here’s the good news: What makes us human is our ability to learn, grow, and change.

Talent is a dynamic combination of curiosity and persistence.

Can we also learn how to dream?

COVID knocked us off our game and made our dreams vanish or feel so far out of reach they now seem impossible and perhaps a bit foolish.

Perhaps you once dreamed about traveling or stepping away from the hectic life you are living and sitting on a beach watching the waves roll in. Maybe you dreamed of owning your own business, changing careers, or learning how to paint or sing.

I would like to report that we are living in a post-COVID world, but we are not. We are, however, living in a new world where we know COVID is here to stay, and we have some tools in hand to live with it if we take precautions.

Wear masks if you want, but if you choose not to, or not to be vaccinated or boosted, learn to be careful of how you travel through your day. Just like with the flu or any other illness: if you don’t feel well, stay home. Protect yourself as well as others. If you think you’ve contracted COVID, see a doctor and get the right medication to alleviate the symptoms and shorten the duration of the disease.

Be proactive rather than reactive.

Back to dreaming.

Having trouble feeling optimistic? You are not alone. In fact, thinking you are alone is one of the fallout complications of COVID. During the last few years of Zooming and working from home, we have lost some ability to make strong connections. Not feeling connected, we feel lonely and isolated, and that is a hard place from which to dream.

I am often invited to speak on radio shows and podcasts. During a recent conversation, the young podcast host disclosed that she had been feeling depressed and disconnected.

Working remotely from home had become physically and emotionally consuming, and the continued fear of COVID was almost paralyzing, to the point where she had quit going out socially and had lost contact with friends.

I suggested it might help her to meet a friend for coffee and talk face-to-face, rather than have yet another scripted Zoom interview or a faceless phone call.

The next week, she thanked me and said she and a friend met at a coffee shop and talked for two hours about everything and nothing and made plans to meet again.

If you can learn how to draw, you can learn how to dream again.

The best way to start dreaming again is to reconnect. Get up, get dressed, get out of your house, and have a face-to-face coffee date with a friend or a colleague.

Talk and listen. Connect. Talk about what you’ve been doing since you last got together, and ask your friends what they’ve been doing. Then take a hard right turn and a deep breath and talk about what you’d like to do next. Ask your friend what they dream about doing next.

It doesn’t matter whether what you want to do is remodel your kitchen, take a trip to the beach, learn to paint, find a new job, or simply go dancing. What matters is that you are talking about what you want to do next, and you are listening to what someone else wants to do next.

Next is the essence of dreaming.

It’s as simple as that.

Sharing your ideas with a friend about what you’d like to do next is the best way to, as Eleanor Roosevelt once said: Do the thing you think you can’t.

It’s the best way to start dreaming again.